Sleep. Glorious sleep. That is eroticism deah and secxualitywhat your mom wants for Mother’s Day. Well, that and a strong drink.
This Mother’s Day, go straight boozy and cozy with mom’s gift. She will thank you -- while sipping on a nerves-soothing neat bourbon under a fuzzy blanket.
SEE ALSO: The best weed gifts for a very special Mother's DayWe've broken down our gift recommendations by presents that will help mom secure some much-needed extra sleep as well as whiskey, bourbon, and rye recommendations from an alcohol expert. Mix and match as you please in order to make mom happiest.
Nap-Friendly Gifts for Mom
This cozy West Elm blanket
Price: $79 (currently on sale for $39.99 – $54.99)
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable Sometimes on my lunch breaks, I walk to West Elm just to touch the throw blankets. I run my un-manicured finger nails with pureed carrots stuck under them over the chunky knits and fantasize about undisturbed naps.
Described as a “soft mix of knits” and “extra cozy,” this blanket is like curling up in an old man’s sweater. Doesn’t your mom deserve to bury herself under the hefty weight of acrylic while dozing off to a marathon of Fixer Upper?
Best for: Moms who like to be cozy while flipping through home furnishing catalogues and/or watching HGTV.
Hammock
Price: $19.89, depending on style
Via GiphyAh, yes, the outdoor nap -- swinging gently in fresh air.
Don’t just hand mom a hammock in a box with a bow, really set the scene. Locate two perfectly spaced trees (or opt for a hammock with a stand), string up mom’s new outdoor nap spot, set up a sturdy side table complete with adult sippy cup, light a couple citronella candles, and tah dah, you’ve created an experience.
Best for: Moms who live in pleasant climates with backyards that can be made child and pet-free with the switch of a lock.
Power Nap Capsule
Price: $25,000
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable If Apple designed a glorified Hot Wheels bed for adults, it might look like the Power Nap Capsule.
Moms seeking luxury power nap relaxation can stretch out in the capsule with a sleeping area 12 inches longer than a king size bed. To avoid small children climbing into the capsule and ruining mom’s nap, fill extra space with snacks, throw pillows, and individually sized boxes of wine.
Best for: Moms who won’t mind you spending $25,000.
Tranquility Pod
Price: $30,000
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable Maybe the Power Nap Capsule caught your eye, but you want to get mom something a little more cave/spaceship-like, so consider the Tranquility Pod.
Yes, it’s $30,000, but isn’t your mom worth it? Think back on yourself as a teenager and then try to tell me she doesn’t deserve this fiberglass shell with its “ultra-suede-topped, memory foam cushion that covers an octagonal waterbed with two lofty ultra-suede pillows.”
Nice.
Best for: omg your mom is faaaaaaancy.
A Weekend Away
Price: Varies
This is Wyoming. Your mom might not live in Wyoming, but maybe you should send her there. Credit: Education Images/UIG via Getty Images A quick escape can provide the perfect reset for moms who just want to sleep in a bed made by someone else.
Browse Airbnb or VRBO for short-term rentals within driving distance. Invite mom to live like Tom Hanks in Big, or like an optimistic and independently wealthy millennial on Tiny House Hunters.
Best for: Moms who have group chats with wine-drinking friends and like exploring new places.
An Evening In
Price: Free
Via GiphyJust leave the house. Pack up the pets and small humans and leave mom alone. Go. Now.
There’s something delightful about being alone in a space usually occupied by loud noises and messes. Don’t overthink this one. Really, just leave the house. Please.
Best for: Moms who just want like 15 minutes of uninterrupted silence and the entire couch to themselves.
Sweatpants
Price: $8
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable Not joggers, not yoga pants -- just incredibly basic, middle school gym class-style sweatpants. This may seem like an overly practical gift, but there are few things more delightful than changing into loose-fitting cotton blend after a long day.
Sure, one Amazon reviewer called these “huge around the waist,” but isn’t that the sweatpants dream? Roll the elastic waistband a couple times, stuff some snacks in the pockets, and curl up in Hanes luxury.
Best for: Moms who find yoga pants restrictive and prefer the leisure part of athleisure.
Cashmere Lounge Pants
Price: $140+
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable In the words of George Costanza, “Who doesn't like cashmere?”
Best for: Moms who like the finer things and don’t wipe chip dust on their pants.
Audible gift card
Price: Varies
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Rather than drift off to that episode of The Officemom has seen 27 times, let her fall asleep to an audio book.
An Audible gift card is perfect for moms with a long to-read list and a packed calendar.
Best for: Moms who want to read more but are too tired to even keep their eyes open long enough to scroll through Instagram.
Whiskey Gifts for Mom
Via GiphyNow that you’ve set mom up for ultimate relaxation, add a drink. Or two.
Rather than recommend a bottle of Wild Turkey served in Dixie Cups (my personal choice), I reached out to bourbon expert Linda Ruffenach, founder of Whisky Chicks and author of How to be a Bourbon Badass, for suggestions on the perfect pairings for chill settings.
Angel’s Envy Rye or Angel’s Envy Bourbon
Price: $75+
Chill activity pairing: A bubble bath
Ruffenach highlighted the drink’s smooth finish and recommends letting the whiskey sit on ice for just a few moments before sitting back in the tub and taking a sip.
Macallan 12 Year Old Scotch or Writer’s Tears Irish Whiskey
Price: $62.95 and $39.68, respectively
Chill activity pairing: Binge-watching Netflix
Let mom kick back in her $8 sweatpants, load up Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidtor one of those British crime dramas and settle in with a Macallan 12 or Writer’s Tears. Our whiskey expert also recommends Whistle Pig Old World Cask Finish, if you want to splurge on mom (best served inside her $30,000 Tranquility Pod).
Basil Hayden
Price: $40
Chill activity pairing: Anything that requires more than wine
If mom is more of a wine drinker, but interested in giving whiskey a swirl, Ruffenach recommends Basil Hayden as a starting place. But if whiskey is still too much for mom's pinot grigio-loving palette, try an Old Forester 86 mixed with ginger ale over ice.
Smooth Ambler Rye
Price: $70
Chill activity pairing: Friday night after a long week
Via GiphyEveryone deserves an award for making it to the end of work week, moms especially. Ruffenach says to try this whiskey while "hanging outside with the neighbors and maybe enjoying s'mores over an open fire." Yes. Do this for mom. For a splurge (read: after a REALLY long week), try Michter’s 10 Year Old Rye.
Happy Mother's Day -- now go grab 7 minutes of sleep on the bathroom floor.
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