Set as Homepage - Add to Favorites

日韩欧美成人一区二区三区免费-日韩欧美成人免费中文字幕-日韩欧美成人免费观看-日韩欧美成人免-日韩欧美不卡一区-日韩欧美爱情中文字幕在线

【самбурская порнографии】I am Donald Trump's history tutor and everything is going great

People always ask me what it's like being Donald Trump's history tutor and самбурская порнографииI always tell them the same thing: It's great. I make $10 an hour and it's the easiest job of my life.

The president loves to learn. He has a curiosity that reminds me of former President John Adams -- who used to take apart cars and boats in the south lawn, look at them for hours, and then try to put them back together -- refusing to use the bathroom until they were complete, no matter how long it took.

SEE ALSO: The world is a bad reality show right now so we imagined GOP politicians as MTV's 'Next' contestants

I got the tutoring job out of nowhere. I was sitting in the corner of my apartment, sipping a glass of red wine vinegar and staring directly at the wall, when my phone rang. It was Paul Ryan, practically hysterical. I was taken aback. I had only recently posted my tutoring services on Fiverr and was certainly not expecting to hear from whoever Paul Ryan is.

"We have a big problem," he said. "The president doesn’t know anything about history and we need a tutor. It's an emergency." I had not held a teaching job in years, so I accepted immediately.

One of my first lessons with Donald was about Frederick Douglass. Frederick Douglass, for those who know don't know, is immortal and still living somewhere but nobody knows where. This is the lesson that got me fired from my old elementary school and has since prevented me from holding any teaching job at all. It’s controversial, maybe, but I stand by it 100%. Frederick Douglass is still alive and if he knew me we would be friends. That’s just what I believe and what I teach.

Mashable Trend Report Decode what’s viral, what’s next, and what it all means. Sign up for Mashable’s weekly Trend Report newsletter. By clicking Sign Me Up, you confirm you are 16+ and agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. Thanks for signing up!
Frederick Douglass is still alive and if he knew me we would be friends. That’s just what I believe and what I teach.

After that we moved on to my God, Andrew Jackson. We pray to his bust thrice a lesson and then we kiss the bust on the lips. I told Donald, “Andrew Jackson would have prevented every war, were he alive for them.” Donald asked me if it was possible that he, too, was immortal. I told him I didn’t know, but it certainly got me thinking.

Donald has come a long way since we started our lessons. When I first met him he was in his bedroom watching cartoons in the nude while on the phone with 9-1-1, desperately asking the operator if the Muppet Babies were real. Tears were in his eyes and he was scared. He knew absolutely nothing. I mean, reallynothing. It was incredible actually. All he really knew how to do was smile, raise his thumbs, and say “I love _____.” But he was damn good at it. It got him this far after all.

Yesterday I taught Donald about the Civil War for the first time. Unfortunately, there is not much to learn, as the cause of the war has been lost to history. Nobody knows why this conflict occurred. Nor will we ever know. It is just speculation at this point. But one thing I do know for sure, and I told Donald this many times, is that if Andrew Jackson were alive, it would not have happened. To see Mr. Trump spreading the content of our lessons in interviews makes me intensely proud.

I also taught him about Abraham Lincoln, the inventor of gravity. I told him how before Abraham Lincoln, nobody walked directly on the ground. Lincoln changed everything, but unfortunately, he died trying to jump the Grand Canyon on his motorcycle.

Next up on our docket is Herbert Hoover, our first robot president. I can’t wait to teach Donald about him. President Hoover was, of course, known for his robotic eyes that could shoot lasers. He also had wings but never actually flew, out of respect for birds. I will also be teaching Donald about World War II, another war that Andrew Jackson would have prevented, and that also has no known cause. Nevertheless, World War II lasted for 70 years, and finally came to an end after the United States hired Iron Man to kill Hitler.

Donald is a great student and I look forward to teaching him more about history.

If anyone is well-versed on the topic of science, we are looking to hire another tutor. Please reach out.


Featured Video For You
'American Gods' is weird but is it too weird?

0.1218s , 7918.34375 kb

Copyright © 2025 Powered by 【самбурская порнографии】I am Donald Trump's history tutor and everything is going great,Public Opinion Flash  

Sitemap

Top 主站蜘蛛池模板: 日韩一区二区三区视频在线播放 | 久久久久久精品免费 | 东热精品无码一区二区三区 | 国产成人拍精品视频网 | 国产精品白浆无码流出在线播放 | 久久久国产精华特点:传承与创新 | 揉揉久久 | 无码人妻精品国产婷婷 | 国产综合免费视频 | 亚洲欧美精品在线 | 精品无码人妻一区二区三区国产 | 亚洲国产婷婷香蕉久久久久久 | 亚洲精品乱码 | 日韩成人动漫第一页 | 第一页卡通动漫在线桃乃木香奈在线观 | 免费毛片 | 一区二区三区91 | 精品国产福利第一区二区三区 | 丁香五月天综合福利区 | 亚洲麻豆av成本人无码网站 | 免费人妻精品一区二区三区 | 国产福利91精品一区二区三区 | 亚洲婷婷第一狠人综合精品 | 精品国产无套在线观看 | 久久国产亚洲观看 | 激情综合色综合啪啪五月丁香 | aⅴ东京热无码专区蜜芽 | 精品99久久久久久猫咪 | 成人午夜在线观看国产 | 国产真实伦偷精品 | 中文精品一区二区三区四区 | 99免费在线观看视频 | 久久久久久久久久无码 | 婷婷日日夜夜 | 亚洲精品另类 | 国产亚洲欧美在线中文无广告亚洲精品日韩美女高清写真图片 | 二区女人观看chinese中国真实乱 | 国产天堂网一区二区三区 | 日本 一二三 不卡 免费 | a级国产片在线观看 | 亚洲国产成人精品区综合 |